Usual disclaimers apply.
copyright clare holborow 1997.

"Wish Fulfilment"

By Clare Holborow

 

Counsellor Deanna Troi lay on her bed in her quarters, the lights dimmed so low
they barely lit the room. It had been a long day, and at last she had some time
to herself, to relax and rejuvenate her inner self. Her dark curly hair was
fanned out beneath her head, her eyes closed. She wore a simple blue sleeping
garment that was designed to feel comfortable. Relaxing, she let her mind take
her where it wanted to go, and before long she was in a trance-like state.

She jumped involuntarily as she suddenly felt a warm hand touch her lower leg.
It was a strong yet tender hand, familiar to her. She opened her eyes and sat
up, wondering who was with her in the room. It was too dark to make out the
man's features - and oddly enough she could not sense him. But she could see
the outline of his broad muscular figure leaning over the bed.

Firm yet gentle hands on her shoulders pushed her back down on to the smooth,
luxurious fabric that covered the bed. As she felt her head touch the pillow
again she noticed a lovely bunch of flowers on the table beside her, although
she was certain that they had not been there before. In fact, she was certain
she had seen them in Doctor Crusher's quarters.

Her mind was quickly brought back to the present. She did not feel frightened
or threatened by the mysterious visitor, who had begun softly caressing her
body with his hands. She found herself relaxing again after the initial shock
of his sudden appearance. His touch felt so good and lacked any urgency she
might have expected.

She reached out to touch him, but he avoided her hands, willing her to relax
and enjoy what she was feeling. That very pleasure made it easy for her to
block out anything else - even the questions she wanted to ask. This man was
concentrating on how she felt and ignoring his own impulses and desires.

The empath had no objections when her night-dress was taken off and moved out
of the way. She felt nothing except the presence of him. And although the only
part of him that had touched her were his hands, she wanted more. Her breathing
was becoming more erratic, her heart beating faster with every moment.

He recognised the signs and chose his moment to move up against her. She felt
the familiar fabric of a Starfleet uniform against her skin, causing a shiver
to run up her spine. She rolled on to her side to face the mysterious man. "Who
are you?" She whispered.

He silenced her with a long kiss as he pulled her close against his broad
chest. It was then that she felt the brush of a beard against her face as he
kissed her. She ran her hand through his hair to confirm her suspicions. When
they finally broke apart, she whispered the name of the man she thought she was
with. "Will?" She sounded rather breathless, finding it hard to believe it had
taken her so long to discover his identity. He had never been so passionate and
yet so considerate of her feelings that he ignored his own before.

"Imzadi." He replied seductively in her ear, confirming his identity. His lips
followed the same path his hands had taken previously and she groaned with
delight as he continued. She reached across and pulled at his uniform, wanting
him to be in the same state of undress she was. Her hands moved across his warm
chest underneath the uniform. She was sure he wanted her, although she still
couldn't sense anything. Perhaps it was because her mind was relaxed and full
with the feelings of her own pleasure that there just wasn't room for anything
else.

His uniform soon joined her night-dress on the floor as she found herself
unable to hold out any longer and pulled him closer. She felt as if she might
explode as he moved on to her. It had been a long time since they had.........
not that she hadn't wanted it, and she knew he thought about it sometimes. She
kissed him again as they were about to re-consummate their relationship. She
still couldn't sense what he was feeling, undoubtedly he was feeling some
strong emotions as he became closer to becoming one again with her.

Suddenly she became aware of a ringing sound. She opened her eyes in surprise
and found herself alone in her quarters. She stared around the room. It was all
a dream. She realised with some disappointment.

"Come in." She said, as she recognised the ringing sound as being her door
chime. The doors parted to reveal the one person she didn't want to see until
she had time to think about the dream. Wish fulfilment! She realised. Some
dreams had events and objects that represented aspects of the person's life.
But other dreams were sheer wish fulfilment - something she had studied with
extra interest when she first studied psychology. It had fascinated her,
perhaps because she had never had such a dream herself. Until now.

"Oh, I thought you might be ready by now." Said the ship's First Officer,
looking at her night-dress. They had been having breakfast together more and
more frequently for months.

"I'm sorry." She said, hoping he wouldn't notice that she was blushing
slightly. "Just give me a few moments." Her eyes couldn't tear themselves away
from his hands as she remembered how they felt on her naked skin.

He nodded and began replicating food from the replicator as she disappeared
into the other room. He wondered why Deanna looked slightly flustered. He
concluded that she must have a reason, but he did not want to pry. His mind
wandered to other things, such as the delicious food that was now laid out on
the table.

She walked back into the room, wearing her uniform ready for duty. She smiled
at Will as she sat down opposite him and gazed at the wonderful array of dishes
there.

During the meal, she stole glances at him when he wouldn't notice. Every time
she looked at his face, she recalled the sensuous feel of his lips and the
brush of his beard on her body. She wanted to tell him what she had dreamed,
and how it had only confirmed her feelings for him. She wondered if he had
similar dreams about her, but she didn't have the courage to ask. He got over
me a long time ago. She thought for the thousandth time, but for the first time
she had some doubt in her mind about that. Her empathy wasn't much help in
telling her how he felt. She simply sensed calmness and his usual relaxed
manner. He was always like that when they were together.

Deanna looked across the table at her friend, and wondered if they would ever
be more than just good friends. They were, in a way because of the Imzadi bond
that neither would ever share with anyone else. It didn't matter because they
would always be there for each other and they had all the time they wanted to
sort their relationship out. But they had to start somewhere, someone had to
make the first move, and although she had become sure of her own feelings, she
needed to know his.

She looked at him with her dark Betazoid eyes, debating whether to say anything
and how to say it.
If I don't say something now, I may never find the courage to again. She
thought to herself. She began the sentence that could change both their lives.
"Imzadi......"

But what happened next is another story.

Wish Fulfilment Part 2 (Due to popular request!) - By Clare Holborow

Riker looked up, as Deanna spoke their private word in a tone that told him she
was about to say something important, something she needed to say. She felt the
butterflies in her stomach as she opened her mouth to confess all her feelings.

Suddenly they both heard the sound of the klaxon from the bridge and the
monotone voice of Data. Red Alert, all senior staff to the bridge.

Will and Deanna immediately dropped their forks and rushed to the turbolift. He
turned to her as they waited for the lift to take them to their destination.
Was there something you wanted to say?

But the mood was broken. She didnt want him to remember her telling him in a
turbolift when both were wondering about the cause of the Red Alert. She shook
her head and smiled. No, nothing important. They turned back towards the doors
as they opened to reveal the interior of the bridge. Data stood up and turned
to look at them - Picard was evidently still on his way, although Worf was at
his post at the tactical console.

Deanna sat in her usual seat to the left of the Captains chair as Data informed
Riker what had happened. Sir, we will be forced to delay our diplomatic
assignment at Dreagas VI. We have intercepted a distress signal from a planet
inside the neutral zone.

What is the nature of the distress signal? Riker asked.

They claim to have been attacked by a pair of Romulan ships, Commander. They
have destroyed almost all the structures according to our sensors and there are
very few life signs. They need medical assistance.

Helm, plot a course to the source of the signal.

Commander, the planet is approximately half way into the Neutral Zone. Said the
ensign at the helm.

I am aware of that ensign, please continue. Maximum warp. He ordered in a tone
that reassured the ensign enough to set the co-ordinates and engage the engines.

Bridge to Dr. Crusher. Riker wasted no time in checking that she was prepared.

Crusher here.

Have you been following the situation?

Yes. We are ready to accommodate any people on that planet who require
attention.

I think we will need to form an away team, Doctor. Please be ready with as many
assistants you need in transporter room three in time for our arrival. He
replied, as Picard arrived on the bridge.

Report, Number One. Picard said as he walked purposefully down the ramp from
the turbolift to face his first officer.

As Riker brought Picard up to date on the situation, Deanna couldnt help but
admire him. He had decided that they had to help the people who had sent the
distress signal, despite the fact that they had to enter the Neutral Zone to do
so. She loved the strength she sensed from him in these situations, and thought
to herself again that he deserved to have his own ship, his own command. She,
along with everyone else on the bridge turned her attention to the viewscreen
as Data announced that they were entering the Neutral Zone.

Deanna sensed the tension level on the bridge rise significantly at the
androids words. The bridge was silent as they waited anxiously to arrive at the
source of the signal.

After about thirty minutes, which seemed like hours to the crew, who all knew
the trouble it would cause if they were discovered in the forbidden sector of
space, they sighted the planet in trouble.

We will arrive in one minute, thirty five seconds. Sensors are not picking up
any other ships in the area. Data reported.

Picard nodded at Riker, who assembled his away team. Counsellor, Ensign Lopes,
Lt. Margat. He said, the latter two being security officers. Picard had
requested that Worf and Data remain on the bridge in case there were any
cloaked Romulan ships that the sensors had failed to identify.

Riker and his away team, now joined by Dr Crusher and two other medical
officers, Lt Alyssa Ogowa and Lt Henry Jona, materialised on the planets
surface. All around them was desolation, and Beverly rushed to help a man lying
on the ground nearby. Deanna tried to shut out the feelings of pain and despair
she felt from the survivors dying around them. She couldnt see them all, but
they were there somewhere nearby. She felt one particular person who seemed to
be calling out for help with her thoughts. Deanna followed her senses as she
ran into a copse of trees. Leaned against one strange looking tree she found
the woman, who had phaser burns to her chest and legs.

Tried to get away... She gasped at Deanna, someone she instinctively trusted.

Deanna tapped her comm badge, but it did not respond. She reassured the woman.
Im going to get some help. Ill be back. She ran back along the path to where
she had left Beverly and the others. She looked around, seeing the man still
lying on the ground where the medical team had been treating him when she left
the clearing. Where did they go? She asked him.

Too weak to talk, the man simply pointed to the West. She thanked him as she
ran in the direction he had indicated. She kept running until she stumbled upon
a large group of injured people. Beverly and her officers were in the process
of helping them. Beverly! She said, out of breath from all the running. Theres
a woman over there. Shes been shot pretty badly with a phaser.

Beverly stood up and followed Deanna as they ran back to the copse. But that
means.. Beverly suddenly said.

I know - they didnt just attack from orbit, there must have been some of them
down here too. Deanna interrupted. They could even still be here.

They reached the injured woman, and Beverly began treating her. These burns are
definitely from a Romulan phaser. She confirmed.

It suddenly hit Deanna that she hadnt seen Will since they beamed down. Wheres
Will? She asked Beverly.

I dont know. They went along the path opposite us. She replied, pointing.

I have to find him, to warn him. She said, not wasting a second to listen to
her friends concerned objections. She tapped her comm badge again as she ran in
the direction Beverly thought Will had gone. For some reason the badge wasnt
working. Damn. She muttered to herself. The path had stopped abruptly and there
was nowhere else to go. The foliage in front and around her was so thick the
only way she could go was back along the path she had just come along. She
turned around and went back, looking for the missing members of the away team
as she went.

She reached the clearing, to find Beverly and her team still attending to the
injured. She ran to her friend and confessed in a shaky voice that she couldnt
find Will.

Beverly returned Deannas worried look. I don't know where they are either. She
replied. Suddenly they felt the familiar sensation of the transporter beam
encompassing them. At the same time she thought she felt Will calling out to
her, but as quickly as she had sensed it, it was gone again. They materialised
in the transporter room. Deanna looked around and saw that Will and the two
security officers were not with them.

She stormed on to the bridge. Captain, why did you beam us up? Will is still
down there.

I know he is, we couldnt locate him or his team down there. What happened?

Hes missing. I tried to find him. There were so many injured people down there.
She wasnt even concentrating on what she was saying, all she could think of was
Will.

The answer to her other question was plain on the viewscreen. Three Romulan
Warbirds had uncloaked in front of them. They were resisting all attempts at
communication other than their initial threat, which Deanna assumed was Get out
of the neutral zone or we will interpret your presence as an act of war.
Picard told Deanna that they had not responded to his accusation that they had
caused planetwide destruction and the Enterprise had only entered the Neutral
Zone to answer the distress signal.

Helm, get us out of here, maximum warp. Picard said grimly.

Captain, you cant. Hes still down there. We cant just leave him there. Deanna
said, raising her voice.

The last thing I want to do is leave him there, Counsellor. But we cant stay
here - the lives of the whole crew come above the lives of three men.

She understood the logic, but she hated it. The thought of Will being left in
the Neutral Zone was too much for her. She tried to hold on to the feel of him
calling out to her, as it could be the last time. Her eyes watered as she
thought of what would happen if the Romulans found him and held him prisoner.

Deanna didnt even ask for permission to leave the bridge, she simply stood up
and walked out. She knew what she had to do. She heard Data tell the Captain
that the Warbirds were also returning to their own sector of space.

She knew what she had to do, she had to tell him that she loved him and wanted
him back. If she didnt do something, she could regret it for the rest of her
life. A few minutes later she was in the shuttlebay.

Back on the bridge, Data noted her actions. Captain, there has been an
unauthorised shuttle launch from shuttlebay three.

Identify the pilot.

On the viewscreen came the image of the Ships Counsellor. She looked up.
Captain, I know what youre going to say. I don't want the whole of the ships
crew to be in danger just to save Will, but I am willing to place my own life
in jeopardy to find him.

He shook his head. Deanna, don't do this.

I have to, I cant just sit around doing nothing. He needs me, and the Romulans
are far less likely to identify a shuttlecraft than Starship.

Mr Worf, place a tractor beam on the shuttle.

Captain, what she is doing is honourable. He replied defiantly.

He turned around in surprise to look at his security chief, who looked at the
Counsellor with a new found admiration.

Picard realised that in order to rescue the away team they would have to take a
shuttle, Deanna was right in that respect, he just wished that she had told him
what she wanted to do. He turned back to her, clearly not happy about the
situation, but admiring her courage and strength of character that only seemed
to show themselves when he least expected. Be careful Counsellor. We will await
your return in Federation Space.

She smiled gratefully. Thank you, Captain. She said, and her image disappeared
from the front viewscreen. Picard hoped that would not be the last he would see
of her. For some reason, it wasnt the day for a lot of optimism.

Deanna found her way back to the planet with ease, although she knew the
hardest part would be finding her Imzadi when she got there. She could not find
him before, why should it be any easier for her to locate him this time?

The shuttle landing was smooth and easy, much to her surprise. She felt
emotions she had tried to suppress for the length of the journey force their
way to the surface; desperation, despair, love and fear. She took a phaser and
a small medical kit before she left the shuttle.

Opening her mind, she searched for even the slightest indication as to his
location. The cool wind on her face and neck made her shiver. She ran back
along the path Beverly had seen him walk down, then realised that she would
have been too busy tending the sick to notice if he had taken another path
after discovering the dead end.

She rushed back to the clearing and took the other path, the only place she had
not considered looking. Another dead end. She cursed silently to herself, and
walked back, feeling useless and at the same time hoping that he hadnt been
taken captive by the Romulans. I have to tell you something. She thought,
fighting the images from her dream that tried to remind her what she had been
missing. But she also thought about his smile - would she ever see it again?
His laugh - would she ever hear it again? And most of all, their special
friendship. She had never felt so close to another person as she did to him,
even though they had not resumed their romance. Doing that would have been the
one thing that would have made their relationship complete. Why didnt I tell
him in the turbolift? She asked herself, at least he would have known how she
felt.

It was then that she noticed a hole in the ground at the edge of the path. She
could suddenly sense him, he was still alive - and he was down in the hole -
she was sure. She could sense someone else down there with him - one of the
security officers? But that still meant that one person was missing.

She looked down the hole, which wasnt a steep drop, but more like a tunnel that
went underground. Unholstering her phaser, she crawled down on to her stomach.
Her eyes opened widely to accommodate for the decrease in light as she moved
deeper into the tunnel, which eventually opened into what could only be
described as an underground room. She was more certain than ever that Will was
there somewhere, and now she could identify his feelings - pain and fear.

Soon the roof of the tunnel was high enough for Deanna to stand up. She felt
filthy from the dirt, and whilst that would usually bother her, she continued
looking for Will. She almost stumbled over the dead body in her path, but she
continued walking, knowing the security officer was beyond help. And she did
not fail to notice the phaser burns that had scorched his body. Her hand
gripped her own phaser even tighter as she moved on. The other deceased
security officer was only a few meters away from the first.
She almost shouted with joy as she saw her Imzadi in front of her.

Deanna ignored her nervousness as she ran towards Will, he was sat up against a
rock, and she felt his pain more strongly than before. He had clearly broken
his leg and had suffered some phaser burns to his chest. He was almost
unconscious with the pain. Thank God Ive found you. She said, frowning.

He was in a lot of pain. His eyes searched her face as he struggled to keep
them open. Imzadi... He wanted to say more, but couldnt find the words.

She whirled around as she sensed the other life form was close by. Her concern
for Will had distracted her long enough to forget about that. She stood to face
the Romulan, who had walked up behind her. Her eyes narrowed with sheer hatred
of the being that was heartless enough to inflict pain on others. As a
Betazoid, she found it hard to comprehend the motivation behind such acts of
violence, although as a Counsellor she had studied the causes.

She moved towards him as he backed away from her, towards the wall behind him.
You did this. She accused. It was not a question. She aimed her phaser at him,
wanting to do something, even simply frighten him. But that was not enough. She
wanted revenge, she wanted him to feel what the two dead officers had felt and
what Will now felt. He too held a phaser, something that had not escaped her
notice.

They left me behind. He said bitterly, Deanna presumed he meant his away team.
She didnt want to hear any excuses, she was incredibly close to firing her
phaser.

Will was watching the whole scene from behind her. Deanna! He said, somehow
realising how close she was to doing something she would regret later. She
turned around to look at him, and in that instant the Romulan levelled his own
phaser at her and fired. He had used a lot of its energy firing at the others,
and the blast was not fatal, but it was strong enough to send her sprawling
backwards on to the floor after hitting the side of her head.

She pushed the button to make the phaser give its maximum power, and fired
straight back at her assailant without a second thought. She sensed the life
fading from him as he too fell backwards, dropping his phaser and hitting the
wall behind him.

She wasted no time in crawling over to Will, and using her medical tricorder to
establish how bad his wounds were. The equipment in her medical kit was
minimal, but she was able to give him a painkiller, ignoring her own pain from
the phaser blast she had received to her head.

Will was grateful for the painkiller, and although he still felt far from
himself, he was able to smile at her. Imzadi, I thought youd gone. He said in
surprise, brushing her matted hair away from the wound on her head.

How could I leave you here? I didnt know whether you were dead or alive. And I
wanted to tell you something.

Was that what you wanted to tell me back on the ship?

Yes. She lowered her head to look at the ground. But now is not the right time
to tell you.

Tell me.

Its not the right time. She insisted, looking back at him.

I want to know. He said.

My God Will, its not something I can just come out and say, especially when we
need to get out of here. You need to have proper medical attention.

Deanna!

She sighed, realising he would not let it pass. OK, promise you wont be angry
or upset that I havent told you sooner.

He nodded, and she continued. Ive been thinking about the way we used to be
together, and the strong relationship we have developed since then. And Ive
come to realise that Im still in love with you Imzadi. She said, dreading his
reaction.

I think that Romulan hit the wrong part of your head. He replied softly.

So you dont feel the same? She shouldve known he was over her, and had been a
long time ago. She tried to hold down the tears that were welling up in her
eyes. After all that she had put herself through, he didnt feel the same. He
probably thinks of me more like a sister. She thought.

Deanna, Ive never been closer to anyone than I am to you, and I love you
dearly. He paused.

But...

No, there is no but. What I wanted to say was that I have always thought we
would work things out, but now that Im presented with the decision, I dont know
what to say. I thought it would be the other way around - me begging you to
take me back.

Im not begging. She said quickly. If Im not good enough for you, thats fine, I
can accept that. Come on, we should be getting out of here.

She moved towards the faint light coming from the surface. He dragged himself
along behind her, not wanting to put any pressure on the broken leg. Deanna,
wait. I didnt say that, and I cant get out of here without you.

She turned around, any bitterness she had felt a moment before vanishing as she
saw him struggling to move across the ground. She went back to help him. Im
sorry I snapped at you. She said as they moved together. This is important to
me, to both of us.

I know. He said, wincing again at the pain he still felt even after the drug
she had given him. Thats why I dont want to rush in to anything.

She laughed.

What?

I just never thought I would hear you say something like that. She admitted
with a smile. Fine, if you need time to think about it, then think.

He looked back at her, and saw the love in her eyes. Every one else he had been
involved with recently had looked at him with lust. His Imzadi was really in
love with him, and if he was honest with himself, he had always wanted to
settle down into a comfortable, loving relationship with someone who wanted
more than just a casual romance or a few nights of passion. She really cared
for him, worried about him and most importantly, understood him.

She could see the thoughtfulness in his expression, his eyes gazing into hers
as if something he saw there would help him decide. I have everything to gain
and nothing to loose. He thought, and whispered Yes, I want you back Imzadi.
This time I wont ever leave you.

She responded by leaning over and kissing him softly, a loving kiss that was
full of promise and tenderness, so different from any he had had for a long
time. She took his hand and put her other arm around him, leading him towards
the light. I love you Imzadi. He heard in his mind suddenly, causing him to
draw in a breath. It had been a long time since she had done that. It always
made him feel as if they were a part of each other, and that she was always in
his mind. He twisted his head around to kiss her again. Were never going to get
out of here! He said when they separated.

Maybe we should make this tunnel our new home! She suggested playfully. They
looked down to where they had just been then back at each other. Lets get out
of here! They said together.

Deanna struggled to help him hop back to the shuttle, but her perseverance and
his determination to be brave meant they made it back. Exhausted, they fell on
to the seats inside and Deanna launched the craft immediately, wanting to get
him to sickbay as soon as she could. As predicted, the Romulans had left the
sector, their attack on the planets inhabitants still a mystery, and they
certainly didnt notice a lone Federation shuttle making its way back home.

*************************************

A week later Deanna and Will were both back to their usual duties, although
they still felt tired from their ordeal and Will still had occasional flinches
of pain in his leg. Deanna was beginning to wonder if he exaggerated the pain
just to get looks of sympathy from her lovely dark eyes. She would never tell
him that she suspected that though, she just thought of how he would act if
their positions were reversed.

How are you feeling now? She asked, walking into his room.

He looked at her with what she called the puppy dog look My leg still hurts
Imzadi.

She sat down on the bed next to him. And what do you want me to do about it?

Something to make me forget about the pain.

What?

Anything. He replied, putting his arms around her, and pulling her close.

She leaned in, as if to kiss him. Instead she tickled him with both her hands
until he was begging for her to stop. Deanna..... Deanna...... Please, no more!

She grinned, pushing him down on the bed. Let me tell you about a little dream
I had. She said.

 

End

**** This story was written for those people who dont believe in the
significance of dreams! (And Imzadi fans!)***